“But did you die?” I know that last leg of the journey of unraveling wasn’t the most fun thing you’ve ever done, but did you die? #nope
You just did a really big thing and not only has it opened the door for healing, it has set you up for success in what comes next.
What’s next, you ask? Just the next right thing. See that paper over there? The one you poured out your life story all over? Go grab it and take look down your #5’s. That’s the question that asked about your part in all of these life events. There are some people on that list that you have hurt. Intentional or not, there are some people who need to hear you own it and offer an apology.
So make your list. I know you might be thinking at this point that I’ve crossed the line. This is TOO FAR, you might say. What does my 8th grade best friend or my 2nd grade teacher have to do with my unraveling now?!?!?
Ahhhhh, you see, it’s not about them. It’s about you. It’s about owning the hurt you caused and offering a sincere apology so you can walk in authenticity as you move forward in life. It doesn’t mean we welcome these people back into our lives necessarily, but we are doing our part to be responsible for the choices we have made and the consequences along the way.
One caveat here is that we want to offer amends, except when to do so would hurt them or others. Be sensitive to the pain you have caused and do no more harm. Sometimes, it’s best to let sleeping dogs lie.
The moral of the story is this: own your crap.
“Therefore, if you are offering you gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First, go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.” Matthew 5:23-24
Now jump on that list and give that apology muscle a workout. You can do it because you can do hard things. You already have and you will continue to do hard things because you now know the freedom that comes from the unraveling. Your mask is off and you know are not alone in this. You’re not the only one who has come to the end of their false self and felt naked and vulnerable. You are not the only one who at some point has had to break apart like a seed to grow new life.
And this new life feels good. It is good. It is a real, authentic, humble life that allows you and others to be seen and known. It is a life that creates space to to heal and grow as we expand into the people and plans and purposes meant for us. It is a life deeply rooted in identity.
This is an unraveled life.