Growing up, I was always good at anything I tried, because I didn’t even attempt things I knew didn’t have a shot of success. I didn’t like losing and failure wasn’t an option. So I created a safe little life for myself that made me feel good.
The first year was fun, but around 18 months in, we entered a wilderness that lasted for the next 3 years. A difficult pregnancy, and complete financial devastation marked the beginning of that very painful season. I blamed Husband for the pain, which almost cost me my marriage as well. After one particularly ugly fight, I left. I drove around the lake, broken and begging God for a way out. I eventually went back home because we only had one car at the time and I honestly had nowhere else to go.
Over the next few weeks, the Lord began to answer my desperate cries by revealing things in MY life that stood in the way of leaving the wilderness behind. Self-sufficiency and pride were strongholds that needed to be broken before answers would come. What I needed so much more than answers was a good dose of humble pie.
Humility is such a conundrum. It usually comes to us in our lowest moments and yet seems to be the thing that lifts us up. Humility is a breaking of the things we thought we wanted in order to get the things we really need.
Daniel also reaped the benefit of humility. The angel appeared to him with answers to his prayers as soon as he set his mind to understand and his heart in humility.
Then he continued “Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before God, your words were heard and I have come in response to them.” Daniel 9:12
I am always amazed that the angel was sent to him at the beginning of his prayer and not the end. It didn’t seem to matter WHAT Daniel asked for, but rather the condition of his heart in the asking that moved the heart of God. In a moment of fear and confusion, The Lord honored Daniel’s heart and literally moved heaven on his behalf. This verse is such a powerful reminder that my prayers don’t have to be eloquent to be effective when I offer them on my knees.